About a week ago, I posted an article titled, "Who The Hell Are You?". It was all about how one defines who they are. It was a good article. But, since I wrote it, a thought has been nagging me, telling me that I wasn't concise enough with my points, and so may have left some people a little confused. So in this article, I'm picking-up the baton again, and going into further detail…

So, a few years ago, a friend of mine was lamenting about how he didn't like being single and how he couldn't 'get' a girl. Being more experienced in this field, I proceeded to give him some advice on how to change himself to become more attractive to women, and therefore have a better chance of attracting them into his life. His reply was a haughty medley of societal, brain-dead clichés. He didn't believe in changing oneself because that meant 'trying to be someone you're not', and that he'd 'rather just be himself'.

His self defence quietly infuriated me - I knew I was powerless to inspire him to change, or rather, he was powerless to admit that he had to change to attract what he wanted. From that day on, until recently, whenever I've borne witness to someone uttering the same non-specific, meandering self deceit that my friend was spouting, I haven't failed to feel a little frustrated, asking myself the unanswered questions: What makes someone who they are? When is one being someone they're not? Why do I become angry whenever someone speaks this way?

Part of that anger was due to the fact that no matter how much I philosophised upon this, I just couldn't come up with an answer to the above questions. I continued to think about it for years but couldn't put my finger on it. But as my philosophy grew stronger, reasons started to appear, and I will now put those reasons forth.

Firstly, you've heard the proverb: "You are what you are" haven't you? For years that saying frustrated me, because it seemed so abstract and inaccurate. But as I honed my philosophy, I realised that actually, that old adage was a good place to start, in that everything a person does is a projection of who they are. Every action, every subconscious thought, every word uttered - all are an extension of one's philosophy. But the mistake my friend makes, along everyone else in his camp, is to concede that who you are, is who you must remain. Observe.

The man goes to work, he constantly makes mistakes, losing his temper every time, and is not someone to be comfortable around. His colleagues tell him, "Just be yourself!" His manager pulls him aside and tells him, "You're trying to be someone you're not. Don't try so hard!" He thinks to himself, "Aargh! What the hell does that mean? I AM trying to be myself!"

The truth is, he IS being himself. He is what he is. His actions - the making of mistakes, losing his temper, etc, are all indicative of who he is right now: an unhappy, unconfident individual. What his colleagues unconsciously mean when they advise him to 'just be himself' is to be the self that every human has within him the capacity to 'become', the self that every human should aim to be: The humanpreneur.

It's in everyone's best interests to better themselves, to increase their value - to become a humanpreneur. A humanpreneur possesses all the objective qualities that serve to allow him to live to the utmost of his capability. It's this state that every human should strive for. But noone is born a humanpreneur. Everyone must become one.

Indeed, there is no such thing as natural talent, natural ability, 'gifted', or 'natural born' anything. Every baby is born a clean slate; a blank program. You are the way you are because of the way you were programmed in your formative years, until that programming rendered you conscious that YOU could program yourself, and then you took over, still possibly open to outside programming - the extent of which dependent upon the programming you received in said formative years.

So what exactly defines who you are? It's your thoughts, your philosophy, your choices, the way you talk, the way you walk, etc. All of this determines your value. And you attract into your life that which is of equal value to your own. To use an example: walking. The man wants to change his walk. People say, "Why change the way you walk? That's who you are! Stop trying to be someone you're not! Just be yourself!"

But they fail to ask the question: What made him walk the way he does right now? The answer? He did. Based on his programming. Everyone chose their walk based on the programming they've received throughout their lives. They may not realise it, but they did. That walk defines who they are. It defines their value. What if the man has a hunched-over, fast-paced walk? It displays a lack of confidence and pride - inside and out. That's who he is at the moment.

Does that mean he should keep his walk because that's who he is? No! If he really wants to better himself - as every human should - he needs a more valuable walk, one that projects confidence, power, self esteem and pride. He needs to slow his walk down, chest out, head up, shoulders back, head straight forward. When he first tries this, it won't be who he is, because he's never done it.

In the same way as when you first ride a bike, it's not you because you've never done it, and it's incongruent with who are. It's 'learning to ride a bike' that's who you are, when you first try. Then, when you get better at the new walk (or riding a bike), and it starts to become more natural - THEN it is who you are.

It has become your natural walk, and you do it without thinking. The confident manner of the walk and the attributes that define it (slow, free, tall) have served to project a new, inner confidence that has grown from the exercising and practise of other traits. And congruency is attained. This walking example is just one example of the million things you can change about yourself to become more valuable - to yourself.

With all that said, I'm going to put an end to this right now - there's NO excuse for staying the way you are, just because that's the way you are. Unless you really DO want to stay the same, you'd better move out the way of all those that DO want to strive to be brilliant - as every human should want to be.

Improving yourself does NOT mean being someone you're not. It means doing things you wouldn't normally do - things that those whom you are striving to emulate do themselves - until those things are natural, your value therefore increased, and the reward of like value - now, rightfully yours; in the process, becoming a better you.

The advice I gave to my friend all those years ago focused on acquiring traits that a humanpreneur possesses, traits that would serve him in not just the attracting - and enjoying - of a girl(s), but also in achieving greater things in life. I explained to my friend how to act around a woman (how to display masculine, leadership qualities), I told him what to say (how to convey confidence and humour). I was showing him how to become a more valuable human being.

All this advice would have meant him 'learning a new walk', that wasn't his at first. But, with practise and exercise, the walk would soon start to feel natural, until it became HIS walk, and then all the prizes that having a valuable walk such as this wins you, would now rightfully be his.

But he opted to keep his low value walk. With a low value walk, comes a low value life. You can't cheat life. And I realise now, it's this choosing of mediocrity, to deny oneself the excellence that is there for the taking, to crawl instead of walk - it's this that makes me angry. This laziness. There's no reason for it. You are who you are. But if you don't like what you have, then you must change who you are. And you can change who you are. Three things go with change.

First, you must decide you really want to change. If you've been programmed as an irrational human being, then you probably haven't read this far, and if you have, most probably think I'm a freak. More fool you. The irrational are like a computer with a virus. Any programming will immediately become infected and hence ineffective. The irrational are not a lost cause, but they need to wipe that virus before they can change.

Secondly, you must decide you really want to change - for yourself. To decide to change because someone else wants you to, or simply to please someone else - is not a true desire to change. It's a completely subjective and abstract way to live. You may as well be a satellite orbiting a planet: wherever the planet goes, you go, since you are gravitating in their atmosphere. The secret is to become your own planet. The bigger, the better. Let people gravitate in your atmosphere. The bigger you are, the bigger the satellites that orbit you.

Third and finally, changing is not an overnight occurrence. It can take a lot of time and energy to change, depending upon how deep the bad programming is that you want to replace. In conclusion, then, ideally, we all need an objective goal when it comes to aiming for whom to become. That objective ideal is… The humanpreneur. It's the best state of a human being one can be. It's individual. It's free. It's strong. It's respectful. It's genuine. It's excellent.

Aim to become a humanpreneur. It's what you were born to be, wasn't it?

To freedom,

Scotty Stevens